When Spousal Rules Go A Little Too Far

A wife came up with a list of “rules” for her husband, and naturally the internet thinks she’s being controlling and that her husband should “run.”

By DAVID on November 12, 2018
(Photo by Doug Pensinger/Getty Images)

There are always some ground rules in relationships. There’s no question that there should be some lines drawn in some places. You know, no wild parties, help with keeping things clean, things like that. This list of rules is being called the “10 Commandments,” and it’s making a lot of people online speak their mind.

The list was posted to a Facebook group by a person who calls herself “Rosiee.” We don’t know details, if it’s a “cover” name, or anything like that. She says that she has some simple rules for her husband, and was hoping for some advice from the group. The group is called “Get It Off Your Chest,” and it allows you to speak your mind and get some collective opinions. Anyway, she posted this list, which is a second-version, mind you. She says that her first version was considered a bit “too harsh,” so she rewrote the list. What’s on the list of rules she has for her husband is below, so let us know what you think about it as well.

The first thing on the list says that her husband can’t have any female friends. Next, she says that her husband can’t have any social media accounts. You see where this list is going now, probably. He also isn’t allowed to have any male friends who have wives/partners. Interesting. She says that her husband is to work at least 50 hours per week. Also, he is not to smoke anything (which seems like a good health-rule, but that’s up to both parties of course).

Continuing down the list, it gets into some other things like drinking. He’s allowed to drink, but only 2-times per year (or less), and must never get drunk. He must also not play any video games. He’s also not allowed to look at pornographic material, must keep the house clean at all times, and must never “go out” without her. People are of course having a field-day with this list, saying all sorts of things about it. “You should just get a dog” says one person. Another says “I don’t think [the husband] agreed to be your slave when you married him.”

A therapist says that these sorts of “controlling” behaviors are associated with “toxic” people. In short, the therapist, Shannon Thomas, says we should remove ourselves from toxic people. We sort of become a victim of toxic people, and start to rationalize their behaviors or defend their controlling behavior. It’s important to recognize this early, and get yourself out of that relationship.

I just want to see the first version of the list. See some more info here.

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