Kelly Clarkson made history as the first-ever American Idol winner sixteen years ago. Of all the show’s winners, she has the most successful and long-lasting music career.

Kelly surprisingly admitted, however, that she actually really did not want to win. Taste of Country reports that she said:

“I do remember [runner-up] Justin [Guarini] and I having a conversation. I was like, ‘I don’t want to win, I don’t want to win’ because we found out we had to do a movie. We just found that out about Top 2 and he really wanted to do a movie and I really didn’t want to do it. I was like, ‘It’d be really super cool if I got second and you got first because the winner has to do the movie and the second one doesn’t.’ I won, so I had to do the movie.”

And it turns out that she wasn’t joking about her very strong feelings about not wanting to do From Justin to Kelly. She told Howard Stern last year:

“I cried so hard because I did not want to do that movie. One, it wasn’t a good movie and two, I never wanted to be an actress. I literally was in Texas, in my apartment, crying in my closet talking to him [Simon Fuller] trying to hide from my family because I felt weak.”

Now things have turned a bit full circle for Kelly, since, as we all know, she’s a judge on The Voice.