Assault With French Fry Gets Thirteen-Year-Old Arrested

This 13 year old will probably never pick up another straw again after getting arrested for shooting a french fry through one, striking a woman in the face.

By DAVID on July 23, 2018
(Photo by Tim Boyle/Getty Images)

Well, that escalated quickly. A 13-year-old boy was charged with assault and arrested. He allegedly shot a french fry through a straw, which hit a woman in the head. Long story short, it would seem that the woman wanted to press charges. The mother of the boy contends that he only fired a portion of the straw wrapper at a friend.

The boy who was charged was with his mother and 3 other friends. All of the friends were also charged in the incident. Now I know you’re thinking that this is pretty ridiculous, and you’d be right. One friend took a guilty plea, one was given a warning, and the other has to actually go to court over the case. Over a french fry that hit someone. Apparently the original fry-to-the-face incident turned into a verbal fight, which then wound up as a fight in the parking lot. I know, I know, nobody wants to get hit in the face by a french fry. I’m sure we can all agree this whole thing took a rather dark turn though.

Here’s the other weird part of this situation – the whole investigation took “months” to complete. The real kicker – after the investigation was complete, charges against the fry-shooter were dropped and he was just issued a warning. The mother says the entire case was a total waste of money, and she maintains that the boy only fired a piece of straw paper. She says “It’s ridiculous. I tried to put a chip in a McDonald’s straw. It doesn’t fit.” The full “fry heard ’round the world” story can be seen over here. Pretty soon this won’t be an issue anyway, since straws are getting banned everywhere.

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